Here are some of the things I see when I visit other blogs:
- Bloggers hosting guest posts from authors, and the way it’s written makes it seem like the author and blogger are close friends (and this post is not part of a blog tour)
- Bloggers getting physical ARCs and talking about their publisher contacts
- Bloggers interviewing publishers (they have a close enough relationship that they can make a whole post about them)
- Bloggers being really close friends with authors
- Bloggers being invited to publisher parties or events
The common theme here that I’m getting at is: a lot of bloggers have close publisher/author contacts.
I don’t.
Sometimes when I see all those posts it makes me feel like I’m blogging wrong, or I’m out of the loop. I’ve been blogging almost two years now and I feel like I should have contacts but I don’t. Here’s a list of reasons I’ve come up with for why I don’t have any contacts:
- I only read ebooks. I feel like the biggest way people get contacts (correct me if I’m wrong) is through requesting physical copies, because that has to be done on a more personal level through email. But I only get my ARCs on NetGalley and Edelweiss, which requires ZERO personal contact with the publisher. Since I have no reason to contact them, I don’t. Thus, I never get any contacts.
- I’m shy. I’m not good at initiating contact. If a publisher were to email me, I’d reply. But I would never be the person to try to initiate contact with publishers.
- I don’t even know how the heck people become friends with authors. I think I just suck at making friends in general.
When I think about it a bit more, I can convince myself that I don’t need those kinds of contacts. Yeah it’s pretty cool, but I’m fine with flying under the publisher radar. I guess I’ve always been someone who just does my own thing. I’ve never been good at making friends, and maybe that same thing carries over into the “I’m not good at making contacts” area. But to be honest, I don’t even know what I’d do with a contact if I had one.
I still get those feelings like, “I’m not an accomplished book blogger because I have zero publisher contacts.” But at the end of the day, it’s fine. You don’t need publisher contacts to be a successful or accomplished book blogger. You don’t need ARCs or blog tour invites. Heck, you don’t even have to post book reviews.
There are no rules when it comes to book blogging. You can be someone with tons of publisher contacts and invites. You can be someone who only reads self published books. Or you can be someone who has zero contacts and doesn’t even post a lot of reviews. Don’t worry about doing things “right” and don’t be afraid because you think you’re not “advancing”. And most importantly, don’t compare yourself to other bloggers. You can do whatever the fuck you want! Break away from the pack, do your own thing, don’t compare, and give zero fucks about what other people think.
I’m so glad you posted this because I sometimes feel like I’m doing blogging wrong because I don’t have any ‘contacts’. But your right, there is no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ way of blogging so it doesn’t matter if you have a ton of contacts or none.
Thanks for posting this! 🙂
Yeah, I am the same way. I don’t have any real contacts with authors or publishers. I have conversed with them but no friend or close type relationships. And I am okay with that. We can’t force these types of things and I don’t request physical ARCs either. I have enough on my plate and I don’t need more books on my overstuffed shelves. Maybe I should try harder, but you know what, I don’t wanna!
I don’t have any contacts, but I also haven’t tried. Like you said, most contacts occur when you ask for physical ARCs and stuff, and I know that being international I won’t have a big chance of getting those anyway. But to be honest, I don’t really care? I know that if I *would* start trying to have contacts and requesting ARCs or interviews or whatever, it would just create much more stress for me because of my fear of rejection and fear of imposing on others.
I dunno, I’m happy blogging the way I am. I feel like I get enough eARCs and I have enough content for my blog. So I don’t mind. But I’ll admit that it has taken a while for me to get to this state of peace of mind.
I’m on mailing lists for publishers and I’ve talked back and forth to a few publicists…but I wouldn’t say I’m buddies with anyone. I know how it feels to be shy! :/ I constantly feel like I’m doing book blogging wrong, but at the ending of the day, YES. I totally agree with you! DO WHAT YOU WANT.
Haha I loved your closing paragraph – brilliant.
I am as far away from an ‘accomplished book blogger’ as a blogger can possibly be. I have zero contacts, I have very few ‘followers’, and I don’t have a lot of views on my blog – and yet I am as happy as can be 🙂 I love my blog …… and I am very happy flying under any kind of radar.
Being international, getting physical ARC’s is hard. But really, I don’t mind. I enjoy the eARC’s I get through net galley and edelweiss and sometimes I get emails from publishers or authors and I reply to them. But I’m not the kind of person to go email myself, I’m way too shy and probably afraid to say something wrong or possibly make mistakes in my emails. Then again, I buy loads of books, it’s not that I really need more books. It’s really like: do whatever you want to do and don’t worry about it. I loved this post!
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I’m so glad you posted this, because sometimes when I see posts like that I feel like I’m doing it wrong or I’m not a good enough blogger because I don’t have contacts or get physical ARCs etc. But I think you’re right about not comparing yourself. Everyone does things differently and, really, I’m actually happy about the way I blog. There’s zero pressure and it keeps my blogging as a passion, rather than something I feel like I have to do in order to not disappoint someone.
I know a few authors and I have a lot of contact with someone from Harlequin Teen, but that’s it. I don’t get physical ARC’s nor do I post all those things. 😛 I don’t really care about that. Sure, it would be sweet to get a few physical books from publishers, but I never expect anything because I live in Belgium and shipping costs are horribly high. Plus all those kinds of posts don’t interest me. 🙂
I do have some contact with publishers. I’m a very shy person too, but one day I just decided to take the courage and it really worked out for me 🙂 It’s much easier to connect with publishers/authors now. I’m always trying to ‘make myself a better person’ to say it dramatically, but sometimes I try to do things I never dared before. I like to challenge myself 🙂
But you are so right! Having contacts doesn’t make you a more accomplished blogger. It’s not about ARC’s/eARC’s or how many authors you have as friends. As long as you are happy with the way things go, it’s fine!
Ya, even the publishers I have worked with I would hesitate to call contacts. I have contacted them, but it’s not like I have a strong working relation with them. I am thankful for the books I get, but can’t compare to other blogs who have been doing it longer and are quite a bit bigger.
I have never been a big fan of blogs that mention this stuff casually too much though tbh. I don’t mind the in-the-mail memes or anything, but there are some that seem to mention talking to a publisher for each and every review \\
I have very few publisher contacts, I don’t actively go out and make contacts anymore because it’s disappointing particularly being an international blogger so I try to concentrate on the more important aspects of blogging to me. It makes me a much happier blogger if I don’t think too much about ARC envy and such. I used to think I wasn’t really advancing as a blogger but really now I don’t care so much. I blog for myself and not for the views, if I don’t get comments on a blog post I’m completely fine with it. In overall it just makes my entire blogging experience much better if I don’t put standards and criterion for me to meet.
I’ve talked to two publicists, but that’s been about it, really. Technically, one of them contacted me first, so don’t ask me how I managed that one. I mean, did I sign up for something? Put my email in a right spot? What? I really don’t know. I don’t think having contacts is necessary for blogging. The whole thing about blogging is. . .well, blogging. I’m a shy person too. I manage alright on the internet, but in general? And I agree with you with the authors. I’ve talked to a few on Twitter and via email, but making friends? Not something I’d say I’m good at. I might make a response to something they say or vice versa, but that’s mostly the extent of it. As I’m going into business and marketing, I’m making myself learn how to step out there more, but I definitely don’t think it’s a necessary component of book blogging.
I don’t have any – but it doesn’t really matter to me. I don’t think it’s important or necessary, and I rarely read books in the same year they’re published.
I’ve got ONE contact, and only because they gave me one eARC on NetGalley and I wanted to find out more about the release and everything because my daughter loved the book. Since I emailed her, though, that contact has approved me for pretty much anything I request from her publisher, which is cool, but not at all what I intended when I reached out to her. I was really just hoping for an answer to my question and maybe to be remembered when it was time for the next book in the series, lol.
Sometimes I wish I had more contacts in the publishing industry…but I’m similar to you – I don’t make friends easily, online or IRL. So…I’m OK with my one publishing contact and I’ll just continue doing my thing and hoping that publishers notice me by my reviews as I receive books from them…
I don’t have any publisher contacts, but there are some indie authors who e-mail or tweet me when they have a new book or something going on, since they know I’m a fan. Although I do think that’s different than having a mainstream author contact, but whatever. It works for me, since I like indie books, too.
I don’t think I’m doing anything wrong, but sadly, I do feel like my blog has plateaued. It’s just stuck where it is, never growing, never going anywhere. But I do love that I have some regular commentors that I recognize, who seem to like my blog the way it is, even without all of the awesome ARCs and giveaways and things. 🙂
I feel exactly the same way. I feel like my blog has plateaued. It’s doing well, but I feel like it’s not moving forward. My activity/page view graphs are basically a flat, horizontal line. It can be a bit of a downer sometimes.
I don’t really have publisher contacts. I doubt my blog is big enough for publishers to even notice. I think there’s only one publisher I often email. It’s only because she requested to be emailed with my review after receiving an eARC from NetGalley. Other than that though, I really have no contacts.
As far as authors, I don’t really have contacts with them either, unless you count an an author thanking me for my review via Twitter.
I don’t think contacts are necessary for a good blog. Plus I’m too shy. I’m hoping on networking at BEA, but really, I know I’ll probably be terrible at it. I think I’m more envious of the fact that people are courageous to go out and make contacts. The thought of it kind of freaks me out. So I’ll probably try to make some, just so I feel like I’ve accomplished some personal networking skills. It’s hardly necessary for blogging though, in my opinion.
One of my 2014 resolutions was to reach out to publishers more. Since the start of the year I’ve emailed one publisher to ask to be added to their mailing list — I spent hours, probably, constructing that email, consulting guides and asking advice. I didn’t receive any reply from them.
It disappointed me a bit, because I felt the same way: everyone else has publisher contacts, and I don’t, and I don’t even get an answer when I try to reach out! I must have been doing something wrong.
But now, I’ve gotten over it. To be honest, I don’t even read blog tour material, and interviews outside of blog tours unless I’m a fan of the author anyway. Regarding requesting ARCs, I realised that my backlog of books I want to read is big enough that I don’t even need to request ARCs. There are plenty of good books already published. I don’t need to read brand new books all the time. Realising all this has made it a bit easier. I don’t even particularly want publisher contacts now.
The only “contacts” I have are indie authors who initially reached out to me because I read and enjoyed one of their books, but that’s like two, honestly. I used to feel the same about people who were always so personable with authors, but I sure as shit said “screw that.” 1. Because I didn’t know how they did it haha. And 2. Because it was never really important to me.
Amen to blogging to the beat if your own drum Ashley. :]
Ashley, I’m a writer and I can tell you, from a writer’s perspective: we love to appear on anyone’s blog. An interview is exposure, and we all want that. Of course, I’m not talking about super famous writers but those of us published by small publishers or self-published. Self-promotion is a hard uphill battle all the way, with very little return, so every bit book bloggers can give us is appreciated.
I subscribe to your blog. Ask me if I want to appear here – in any capacity. An interview, a guest post, a book review. The answer is YES. I’m also thinking: maybe book bloggers would want to appear on my blog, like a cross-culture experiment. Would you talk to me about your love of books and your blogging on my site? Would the other book bloggers? I’d love to have you.
Let’s be friends. You don’t need physical books to do that.
I totally agree! I used to have publisher contacts but recently I just haven’t had the time to initiate contact with them or get to talk to them. I feel like I’ve realized that NG and Edelweiss have all of the books—and MORE in some cases—that I could ever get in physical form. The publishers that deny me on Edelweiss and NG never accept me to get a physical ARC anyways, and I actually prefer ebooks because I don’t need to turn on a light to read. Even though the formatting issues can sometimes confuse me, I’m just so used to reading on my Kindle that whenever I read a physical book it’s weird to have to open my light to read. Fantastic post, Ashley! <33
Keeping these contacts is hard and time consuming. I do have a few and appreciate every single ARC that I get and every request for review. Also, I’m fortunate enough to live in an area where there is an active book blogging community, plenty of events and very friendly authors; thus we see each other a lot and keep in contact too.
Love this post! Although I have made a few contacts, I still feel like I struggle at making connections. I never know what to say and I don’t feel like I know how to reach out to people.
I think the easiest way to make a connection is just by being a fan. Don’t try going to random authors sites. Just try visiting your favorite authors Facebook page and see what all they have to say. If you enjoy the conversations and topics then reply and eventually you just sort of make friends and become a permanent fixture. I mainly visit self published authors but I do visit a few published authors here and there and they seem to remember me so I think the best way is just to be a fan first and foremost.
Great post Ash! I have a few contacts with publishers because I’ve interned at the companies. But I can’t say I’m friends with every publisher, it’s just not possible and I wouldn’t want to be swamped with review requests. It reflects badly on yourself with you can keep up with all of them. As for author friends, I only have one close on because she’s Aussie like me and we share similar interests outside of reading. 😀
This has always made me feel weird too. I’ve always felt this pressure, like having publisher contacts is something I have to have as a blogger. I do have a couple because I review audiobooks, but only one of those was a contact I sought. I love Brilliance Audio, so I really wanted to get on their reviewers list. All I did was tweet about it, and I got an email from someone at Brilliance a week or two later. It was kind of cool. I’m also on the list for Penguin Audio and Simon & Schuster Audio. Recently, I was contacted by Audible. So, I guess I have contacts, but I’m not really friends with them. And I don’t get TONS of audiobooks in the mail. It basically just means I’m on a mailing list to receive their press releases. If I see anything I want to review, I just ask for it and they send it over. I try to be realistic about it though. I don’t want to request a million audiobooks and never get around to reviewing them. I have no desire for contacts about print though. I can get what I need from NetGalley and Edelweiss. If I can’t get it there, I’ll check it out from the library.
It’s hard for the one particular genre I review because most of the ladies are older and I personally don’t have any similar life experiences to theirs so I’ve known from the get go that I won’t have author friends. (I do have some Canadian authors I email with sporadically but… idk us Canadians are just a friendly bunch I guess? Haha :P)
Honestly though, I don’t mind not having any personal/business connections because sometimes I feel like I won’t give a completely honest review due to bias or whatever. It’s funny how serious a hobby like book blogging can be though. It starts small but the next thing you know you’re worrying about contacts and I’ve constantly had to remind myself that this is supposed to fun and not a business endeavor haha. So totally echoing what you said there, do whatever the heck you want with your blog 😛
I don’t have very many contacts that I go to on a regular basis for blog content, but the first time I requested an ARC using the email equivalent of a “cold call” really surprised me. It was for an adult fiction book that was being republished by an American house (it was originally from the UK), and I don’t think they had many people clambering to write reviews. The person I spoke to was downright joyful during our exchange. If you have a few interactions like that in a row, it’s totally possible to develop a lasting business contact. It probably works best for niche bloggers, though. I can’t see the same thing happening to people who request copies of the biggest YA books of the year.
I don’t have any contacts either. To be honest, I didn’t know that emailing PR people to ask for books was a Thing People Do until the last year or so. How do you even figure out who to email?
Part of the lack of draw for me is that 1) I don’t want to give my address out and 2) Like you, I’m more of an ebook ARC person. I don’t buy physical books anymore, and I wouldn’t want to get physical review copies. Not enough space in my apartment for more!
I don’t have any ‘contacts’ either. The few times that I’ve actually requested for ARCs I’ve used the publisher’s general publicity e-mail address. Those were the few times I needed validation to know that I was ‘doing it right’. Definitely silly!
I’m in the same boat as you after 3 years. I have next to no publisher contacts. The ones I have are mainly small indie publishers. I love them to death, but sometimes it hurts to see the connections other people seem to have. But I just try to remember that I read books I love, and I don’t need to have ARCs, I could always buy the book or get it from the library if it’s a big publisher.
Haha! I’m terrible at initiating conversations with people my age, but, for some reason, I’ve always been comfortable talking to adults. It took me a few months on journalism to get comfortable with doing interviews, but it’s as easy as breathing now. I’m actually really talkative once I get to know people.
Also, I’m glad I’m not the only “weirdo” who reads almost entirely on an e-reader.
I don’t think I have contacts in the same way that a lot of bloggers have. I’ve never requested an ARC or anything and I’ve never read a physical one. The very few ARC’s I’ve done were offered to me by an author. So far I’ve gone back and bought the few books I’ve actually done ARC’s of. I’ve been really lucky and have loved all of the one’s I’ve done but I’ve only done it for two separate authors so far.
And on doing your own thing that’s what I love about blogging. There is no wrong way to do it. When I first started and created my Facebook fan page I was trying so hard to do what other bloggers were doing, I wanted to do giveaway’s, cover reveals, guest speakers, takeovers, etc but it was just simply too much. All I accomplished was running around in circles. I just don’t have the time or experience. I do have plans for my blog but I’ve slowed down and now I’m really finding out what it is that I want to do and how I want to do it.
I have a couple of authors that I think of as friends and that I like. I think they’re awesome people but I would never try to insinuate that I have a “close” relationship with them. In fact I consider my favorite author a friend, I’d love to go to a book signing some day and meet them, they even encouraged me to start blogging but I don’t do any ARC’s for them because I’m foremost a fan so it’s more a fan/friend relationship. I’m going to buy and review their books no matter what because they’re my favorite so I don’t want to do ARC’s or be a beta reader. I just like being a fan and supporting authors who’s books I love. I also read a lot of self published authors and I’ve found most authors are approachable on Facebook. Heck I created my FB account just to tell an author how much I liked their books. I’m horribly shy too but I’ve been working on not being so shy.
Also I tend to closely follow blogs like yours that are doing their own things. I don’t mind visiting some of those “big” blogs but most of the time I just think there’s just way too much going on. I don’t know, some of them just have so much that it kind of makes my head hurt and I can’t find anything that I want to read there.
Last year when I got back into blogging, I started slowly until I got involved in book tours and then things got super crazy. I was doing 3 and 4 posts a day, reviewing so many books for tours that I didn’t have time to read for pleasure. All this on top of a full time non-blog job and then I got sick. I had to take a break from the blog and put it on hiatus. I notified all the tour groups I was signed up with and backed out of everything for 3 months. I thought seriously about what I wanted to accomplish with my blog and decided to set limits for myself, and most importantly to STOP comparing myself to other bloggers. It was the smartest decision I ever made. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I don’t HAVE to post every day, but overall by knowing exactly why I am blogging and the goals that I want to realistically accomplish, I have made myself a happier blogger.
Your post totally justified my own thoughts. Thanks for the confirmation that I wasn’t the only one out there feeling that way. Keep up the good work!
I’ve been blogging 2 years now too and I don’t have any “contacts”. I am shy about emailing and asking for things… I think it’s rude even though it’s totally not because it’s just the business of it, but I’m just not like that I guess. I’m not sure if that makes any sense. I guess here’s my real-life example of why I don’t ask for ARCs: You know how Victoria’s Secret sends out the cards for a pair of free undies? Well I am one of those people who feels bad about going there and just using the free coupon, so I will buy something else while I’m there. Which is probably exactly what they are hoping for, so I guess I am a sucker, but I don’t like feeling like I’m only out for free stuff. Thanks so much for posting this… now I feel like I’m not the only one who isn’t blogging right LOL.
Great post. You are definitely not alone and the key piece throughout is, “It’s your blog and have fun with it.” I remember feeling the pressure of Keeping Up with the Joneses when I first started. “You should do this, you should that, if you don’t do this then blah, blah.” I gravitated toward the people that were similar to me, had similar interests, and stopped worrying about what so and so with 50 gazillion followers did. I know it can feel like you’re left out of the “cool” group when some are talking about ARCs, publicists, etc. but it’s not true. There are all kinds of bloggers, reviewers, promoters, etc. for everyone to find common ground somewhere. 🙂
I don’t either! I have never understood how bloggers go about getting to know publishers, unless it is that their blogs and/or reviews are just that awesome that the publishers contact them first. I have contacted 3 authors in my lifetime to review their book, but each time the author had put it out there on their blog or newsletters that they were looking for reviewers. I was just one of many and didn’t get a chance to cultivate a relationship.
Along with everyone else however, I believe it is best to just be the blogger you want to be! If you want to be the blogger who has ‘Big Connections’ I think you are going to have to work at it, but it can be done! Otherwise be who you are and do what you love!
I don’t think there is a wrong way or a right way. It doesn’t matter whether you get physical books or eBooks. I have developed personal connections with authors, publishers etc but I am a chatty-Cathy. A lot has to do with how we interact, sometimes there is a common connection, other times it develops slowly through facebook or six months of emails and comments about the weather. Having said that I am not having anyone over for coffee and our friendships are of the acquaintance variety.
I’m not good at “making contacts” either. I don’t have an e-reader, so all of my ARCs are physical copies that I email for, but there are so many publishers and so many publicists at each publisher, that I don’t interact with any one person often enough to really form a relationship. Also, a lot of publicists never email me back. I don’t know what I’m missing.
I do have contacts, but agree with Kimba that there is no right or wrong way and it is not a measure of success. I just love the publishers I do talk to because they get as excited (maybe even more!) about books as I do! I’ve also become friends with a few authors and it’s made me realize they have the same insecurities as anyone would, along with a really grueling job hahaha.
That said, I don’t participate in book tours all that often or do author interviews because they are both a lot of work and I’m really lazy. I’d rather be reading!
I actually emailed a publisher to request an audiobook last night and it was the first time in forever that I’d done that. I forgot how awkward it felt.
A tiny little birdie recommended your blog as one with high visibility and readership, so I was going to contact you personally to see if you wanted to read The Art of Lainey. But then I saw you weren’t accepting review requests at that time and decided to respect that instead of begging “oh pleeeease!!”
But I kinda wanted to beg. So no, you’re not doing it wrong 🙂
P
Haha! 😀 Well I totally already have The Art of Lainey from Edelweiss! I swear I’ll be reading it soon! 😀
Oh yay 🙂 I hope you like it. But I will be your author-contact-person even if you don’t. I consider all of the MERP Squad my blogger-contact-people since we’re working together on my blog tour 😀
Chatting with you made me decide to start The Art of Lainey now and I loooooved it! 😀 It was such a refreshing book to read after suffering through like 3 DNFs and multiple other <3 star books. It was just what I needed!
*butts in* COOLEST AUTHOR EVARR *backs away slowly*
😀 coolest blog tour company ever 😉 Though Nikki made it sound like everyone was dropping out. Don’t quit. I need you 🙂
I think maybe only one person is? But as far as I know, the rest of us are still here, just a bit busy for a while. 😀
I hear you on the busy thing. Hope life is treating you well. Thanks for the RT yesterday 🙂
Aw, I won’t! I don’t have much free time, but I don’t mind doing the occasional blog tour…especially if it’s yours 😀
<333 I hope everything is going well for you!
I don’t have any of that, either! I’ve gotten a few ARC packages in the 2 years I’ve been blogging, but only when I’ve requested them. And I usually only get 50% of the ones I DO request (which is like, 5 out of 10). I don’t have any contacts – in fact, I usually only request through email addresses that I find online. I don’t know any publishers personally, but I kinda wish I did! I do know a couple of authors, but not well. I talk to them on Twitter sometimes, but that’s as far as it goes. So you’re not alone!
I’m chummy in a distant emaily sort of way with a couple of my publisher and publicity contacts, but that’s come through a couple of years of regular work with them, and they’re just polite and interested (most are not). I use to interact more with authors when I participated in a lot of book tours, but when I started pulling back from those, I lost contact with most if not all of them. And honestly, I’m okay with that. Knowing anyone personally adds a lot of pressure as a reviewer, because you don’t want to hurt their feelings or disappoint them if you don’t like their new book. I like people, and I like interacting with that world (I hope to someday be part of it, published myself), but I prefer the relative anonymity provided my by working through publishers and publicity groups, rather than directly with authors or agents.